AFTERNOON TEA REVIEW: Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon (London)

 

Location: Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon, Fortnum & Mason, London UK

Price: £84 per person (plus add-ons); prices vary for other menus

Reservations: In advance via website

Normally I like to go to afternoon tea with at least one friend. It’s just more fun that way. But if a good tea awaits and I’m flying solo, then so be it.

The Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon is one of the poshest affairs you’re going to encounter. Situated on the fourth floor of Fortnum & Mason, it requires booking in advance and fills up very quickly. That said, if you have the time and the money, it is extremely worth it — especially at the holidays.

It was the special holiday menu that got me to go the extra mile (both literally and financially) for this particular engagement. I'm a sucker for themed and seasonal menus, just as much as I'm a sucker for a fancy afternoon tea. For diners less interested in sweets, there's a savoury afternoon tea with different scones and pastries; but I wasn't about to miss out on the desserts on offer.

Before I go into the menu, it's worth mentioning that going alone was not at all an awkward experience. Most diners were in pairs or groups, understandably; however, I was not the only solo diner there, and the waitstaff took extra time to check in on me. So if you want to check out this tearoom but have no one to go with, don't worry. You can enjoy it solo. (Or do like I did and keep sending snaps to your bestie.)

The Sandwiches

The spread came with five varieties of sandwiches, most being variations on familiar standards. Like everything else on the menu, more was available at no extra cost; but honestly a single serving was extremely filling.

• Coronation Chicken: Not something we tend to have in the US; this is a sort of curried chicken salad originally created in honor of Elizabeth II's coronation. I've never actually had coronation chicken before, but this was extremely nice. My second favorite of the sandwiches.
• Cotswold Legbar Egg Mayonnaise: You know egg salad means business when they tell you what kind of chicken the eggs come from. Honestly, though, egg salad just hits different in the UK. Just a reminder that we could have great things if we didn't chemical wash our eggs.
• Kames Bay Smoked Trout with Dill Cream Cheese: Best of the bunch, at least in my opinion. It tasted like a slightly subtler smoked salmon, which I'm always a fan of.
• Cucumber with Lemon and Mint: An old standby, but if you don't like cucumbers, this probably won't change your mind. I do, and I always save the cucumber sandwich for last.
• Christmas Spiced Suffolk Ham: I'm not big on ham (which I know is a sin for a Virginia girl), mainly because it can be so gristly and salty. But this was thin-sliced and very nice. The spice was unusual, but in a good way; very warm and wintry.

The Scones

Rather than one scone, each diner gets two little scones: one plain and one fruit. The menu says they come with strawberry & champagne preserve or orange curd, but I got little jars of both. I'd bought some of the former for myself last year so I knew I'd like it, but the latter was absolutely amazing. I'm kicking myself for not picking up a jar on my way out. There was also clotted cream which was, of course, excellent.

The Pâtisseries

As much as I love a good tea sandwich, spotting these on F&M's Instagram is what lured me over. Each one looked so beautiful, and they tasted amazing, too.

• Rose Éclair: I saved this one for last. Maybe it's my love of anything rose-flavored, but this was the best of the bunch. Very small, not overly sweet, and absolutely very floral.
• Mandarin Mousse: An orange mousse in the shape of a little Christmas bauble, this was one of the two most visually pleasing desserts (while also still being delicious). I loved the glossy outside.
• Chocolate and Cranberry Bavarois: Tied with the mandarin mousse for aesthetics, this was a little Bavarian cream treat in the shape of a shiny apple. Extremely nice.
• Sticky Figgy Loaf: The largest and densest (and sweetest) item on the menu. If I hadn't been at the far end of an afternoon tea, I might have liked it a bit more. But it sat a bit heavy. Delicious nonetheless.
• Mince Tart: Naturally. It was very standard, but very nice. Nothing over the top or inventive, but it didn't need to be.

The Teas

Of course the tea menu here is absolutely massive, considering the catalogue of blends the shop has to its name. And, like the rest of the menu, you can get refills. More importantly, you can switch up your tea if you want!

I started with the Queen Anne blend, which I'd never had before, and I was not disappointed. It's a very smooth Assam/Ceylon blend that's strong without being overpowering, meaning it served as a nice complement and palate cleanser to pretty much everything on the menu.

As I was wrapping up the last of the desserts, I went with the Smoky Earl Grey — which I'd never had but assumed I would like since I love both smoky teas and bergamot. It was as good as I'd hoped, but I was glad I waited 'til after the bulk of the meal to have it. This was a nice one for enjoying after the fact on its own.

And the Cocktail

Later in the week, I'll be making a post about the different themed and seasonal drinks I had while I was on holiday, because I made it a point to give them a go (even if they were pricey). I told you, I'm a sucker for special menus. But this one goes here, since it was part of the tea menu.

The Turtle Dove Cocktail is the drink featured in the photo above, made with rum and citrus. It tasted a bit champagney (to the point that I imagine champagne was actually part of the mix), but that's a good thing as far as I'm concerned. It was a nice lead-in to the meal, and I loved how the side of the glass was prettied up.

Again, this is a pricey afternoon, and that's a big part of why I ended up soloing this. But you get what you pay for in terms of food, tea, ambience, and experience in general. It's a lovely space with a friendly staff; and if the holiday menu is any indication, the menus year-'round are likely gorgeous. If you can swing it, treat yourself.

THEATRE REVIEW: London Palladium Panto 2025 - Sleeping Beauty

 

When I told UK types this show was on my list, the initial response was pretty much unanimous: “Have you been to a panto before?” The answer is yes, once, ages ago - but it’s true we just don’t have anything like this at home. My closest comparison is “family-friendly Rocky Horror,” but even that isn’t quite right.

All that said, there was sort of an extra layer to the London Palladium show. It wasn’t just a panto, it was their panto - with a recurring cast, running jokes, and a very specific style. If I had to compare this specific production to anything, it would be Steve Allen’s 1985 Alice in Wonderland miniseries: there’s a story we all know, and there is a central title character, but really we’re all here to see a big group of very specific talents show off. The plot is secondary, perhaps even tertiary.

This is a positive review, incidentally. There was no plot, the skits barely hung together with each other by a thread, and I had a great time.

Sleeping Beauty was the conceit, with the story fast-forwarding almost immediately to Aurora’s manufactured meet-cute with the prince and her 18th birthday. Emily Lane and Amonik Melaco gave their roles the full Disney treatment, though Melaco (who was promoted from last year’s ensemble, apparently) got an extra dose of ribbing and comedy sketch work alongside the stars. If you aren’t familiar with panto, know that they aren’t the stars. They’re the excuse for everything else.

Julian Clary, Nigel Havers, Rob Madge, and Paul Zerdin are the Palladium’s panto mainstays. Madge (whom I first saw parodying Glasgow’s Willy Wonka experience on TikTok) appeared as the Diva of Dreams, a sort of host character who also filled the good fairy roles. Ignore the second act “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” parody lyrics - Madge was a centerpiece of the production and shone through it all.

Julian Clary absolutely takes the spotlight and is clearly very loved in the panto space. His costumes, like his comedy, were wonderfully camp and over the top. His double act with Nigel Havers was delightful. And while I’m frankly picky about ventriloquists, Paul Zerdin won me over. I absolutely understand why this core group returns, and is beloved, year after year.

As for the guests, they were a Doctor Who fan’s dream. Catherine Tate (as the evil Carabosse) and Jon Culshaw (as King Julian’s detective) went toe-to-toe, going “undercover” during Aurora’s birthday celebrations. For Culshaw, this meant impressions; for Tate, despite her early-show protestations, this meant playing some of her famous characters. I never thought I’d see Nan doing a rendition of “Don’t Stop Me Now” with a chorus of dancing grannies behind here, but here we are. Culshaw was on top form as always. And while Tate’s comedy isn’t for everyone, it’s absolutely for me, and I loved it. (She handled one enthusiastic heckler with more poise than I would have.)

The sets were unbelievable, with giant thorny vines filling the front of house at the end of Act 1 and huge moving set pieces covering the stage throughout. Despite the deliberately flimsy focus on the story, the key moment of Aurora pricking her finger on the spindle had one of the most gorgeous bits of set in the whole show. A fire juggling act toward the front, depicting the burning of all spinning wheels in the kingdom, was a close second.

While the show itself was great fun, it’s also worth noting that this was the Palladium’s 10th anniversary of panto, and the opening number showcased some great moments from its past. This included Madge performing a “One Short Day” parody coupled with footage of past performances, as well as actual set pieces and props from previous years. This opening alone showed me what I was stepping into - not just a tradition of panto in the UK, but a very specific cast and style with a positive reputation.

It was huge, it was noisy, it was silly,  and I loved it. It’s vaudeville but better. It’s happy and unselfconscious and, while the panto I went to before was fun, this one helped me “get it.” It’s a bit bigger than local pantos - by which I mean a lot bigger (fire, a dozen costume changes, pyrotechnics in general) - and understandably a tougher ticker to get. But if you can? Do. Please.

THEATRE REVIEW: Ride the Cyclone

 

I remember when Ride the Cyclone took off online. And when things take off online, it’s a bit difficult to get me to partake because God knows I’ve been burned before. But this show fortunately did not disappoint, and for a couple of years now I’ve wanted to see a live performance. With Southwark Playhouse staging the show’s first-ever UK performance, I had a solid opportunity during my recent trip.

Since changes are actively made to this script over the years and there are many aspects open to interpretation, I came in a little hesitant. But frankly, I think this was fantastic. It was clearly made with a lot of love for the show and its characters, and changes and embellishments made sense.

For those unfamiliar with the show, it follows a cast of six Canadian high schoolers - Ocean, Noel, Constance, Mischa, Ricky, and an unidentified Jane Doe - who died in a roller coaster accident on a choir field trip. Under the eye of a fortune telling machine named Karnak (himself about to “die” as a rat chews through his power cable), the teens talk about their lives and dreams, with one chosen at the end of the performance to come back to life. While Ocean presses for someone of value to be chosen, the others sing about their internal lives and fantasies… or, in Jane Doe’s case, her lack thereof.

The staging is dark and dreamlike, set in the warehouse of a run-down amusement park, and this staging absolutely captured that atmosphere. Rather than being a puppet positioned to the side of the stage, Karnak was positioned above the stage and played by a live actor (Edward Wu, channeling Cecil Baldwin and doing some excellent animatronic acting). As with previous stagings, this one makes use of projections and relatively sparse set pieces. The costume changes are excellent, especially for “Noel’s Lament” and “Space Age Bachelor Man.”

The choreography was absolutely fantastic, and the cast has some amazing dancers in it. “Talia” went full-on with traditional dancing from both Mischa and Noel, as well as some surprise breakdancing from Mischa at the end. “What the World Needs” had the High School Musical vibe it deserves as well.

“The Ballad of Jane Doe” was very different from the version most will be used to staging-wise, but - and this may be contentious - I preferred this one. Jane wasn’t flown around the stage, but the floating head illusion using a coffin was fantastic and felt more appropriate for her anyway. The dancing, the funeral scene, and the final coffin lid slam at the end were all perfect, but none of the staging took away from Grace Galloway giving the vocals the full send.

As for changes that will matter to hardcore fans. “Uranium Suite” was used instead of “Fall Fair Suite,” which I understand is the norm but I’ve always thought the latter was stronger. Keeping to the changes made in 2023, Ricky is no longer written as specifically disabled, but rather as mute due to trauma. There were a few other small changes here and there, but nothing that I felt altered the flow of the performance or that newcomers would consider “odd” on a first watch. There’s also a final surprise right at the end, something I’d wished a production would do, and seeing it happens for real was amazing.

Ride the Cyclone is a show that’s extremely flexible, allowing for inventiveness that can make it better or make it feel wrong. Fortunately, this first UK outing for the show is exactly what it needed to be: dark, strange, heart-rending, funny, and gorgeous. I envy new fans experiencing the show for the first time through this production. This may well become the new bar for future productions.

BOOK REVIEW: The Snowman Code

 

THE SNOWMAN CODE
by Simon Stephenson
Available now

Blessing wants nothing more than to see her mother Margaret happy. Unfortunately, winter seems to make her sad, and this particular winter has gone on for months too long. And if her mother stays sad, then Blessing may have to move away for good. Fortunately, while she's out skipping school again, she runs into the exact right "person" to help her: a centuries-old snowman named Albert Framlington.

According to the Snowman Code, snowmen must help children in need of assistance, and Blessing definitely qualifies. In addition to the issue of her mother and the neverending winter, she's also set upon by a trio of bullies - hence why she can't go back to school. But as it happens, Albert has a problem of his own: he's looking for his lost love, Clementine, whom he hasn't seen in more than 300 years. And Blessing soon discovers that Albert's problem may be more closely tied to some of hers than expected. To release the world from winter and to help Margaret, Blessing and Albert take up the hunt to find Clementine.

The Snowman Code is just as adorable as it sound - but while it's accessible to young readers and written in a way they can easily follow, it never talks down to them. The narrative addresses a lot of heavy topics, albeit topics that young people won't be unfamiliar with: bullying, mental health (including and especially seasonal disorders), and grief at the loss of a loved one. Albert's well-meaning but reticent nature allows Blessing to be the authority in her own story, speaking out for herself in situations where she is scared or feels endangered. Which, frankly, is important.

While it does not end perfectly happily (but what story of a child befriending a snowman does?), it ends hopefully. After all, just as much as Albert wants to reunite with Clementine, Blessing wants to be back with her mother - and for her mother to be well, or at least as well as can be hoped for. Paired with Reggie Brown's cozy and friendly illustrations, this is a perfect book to read together with young family as a reassurance against the dark, cold months.

TEA PAIRING: Caramel Cabin
Albert and his snowman friends may need to be cautious around especially warm things, but this caramel black tea is perfect for humans looking to guard against the winter chill. Use my code KARA15 to save 15% on this and other blends from Chapters!

THEATRE REVIEW: The Importance of Being Earnest

It’s not often that I get to shows - usually when I go abroad. So while I do have a category for it, expect to see things added to it for maybe one month out of the year. Unless, of course, I actually start paying attention to the things that tour in my area.

That aside.

The Importance of Being Earnest was my priority ticket for this trip. It’s my favorite play ever, besides which it now has Stephen Fry playing Lady Bracknell. I’d heard positive things about the previous cast of this production (which included Ncuti Gatwa as Algernon), so I was looking forward to it.

Short version? I liked it in theory, but some things didn’t feel right in practice.

Production-wise, it took a handful of liberties. An early scene shows Algy (in this production played by Olly Alexander) in a big pink ballgown playing the piano at a party. It’s a fully drag, very lavish scene. It’s not a scene in the original, but it very much set the stage for the aesthetic of this specific production. Both in and of itself and as a marker for the mood of this production, I enjoyed it.

Visually it was lovely. The costumes were gorgeous and colorful, equal parts coordinated and opposing. (Algy’s white suit against Jack’s black mourning garb was a great image.) I liked the use of front-of-curtain mini-scenes to cover set changes. In other words, lots of fantastic choices.

But the actual directing of the cast felt like… a lot?

I remember seeing Stephen Fry as Oscar Wilde in Wilde. There was a scene where he was overseeing a rehearsal of Lady Windemere’s Fan, and he cautioned the cast not to luxuriate in their jokes and wordplay. To paraphrase, he said that the actors should act as though this is simply how people talk. I’ve taken that to heart, and I have noticed that Oscar Wilde feels wrong when you give his words the full send.

The four lead cast members - most of whom I’ve seen in other things and whom I’ve enjoyed in other performances - all played their roles as if they were constantly told to be bigger and more. And that’s not in reference to the content, like the playing-up of things Wilde himself had to keep hidden, but rather the delivery. So many of the upsells of lines (Miss Fairfax talking about “vibrations” being a big one) felt like someone somewhere in the production feared the audience wouldn’t understand the joke. Again, I’ve seen three of the four leads in other things, and I’ve seen them be fabulous. This feels more like delivering what the director wanted.

Algy, easily the one who could have gotten away with being the most flamboyant, was the one who carried this off best. He was still big, but he was big in a way that felt like that’s just who he was - not like his actor was digging for a laugh. And even when he was going what felt “too big,” it was always tone-matching another character. Even his asides to the audience felt natural where they could have felt like a bridge too far. I’m not at all familiar with Olly Alexander, but this performance has made me want to be.

It feels like a bit of a cop-out to say that Fry as Lady Bracknell was the linchpin of the production, but he really was. He was very clearly playing Stephen Fry as The Dame, which was probably the best way to approach it under these circumstances. But he let the lines do the work for him and got more natural laughs. He is easily my favorite Lady Bracknell so far, and far and away my favorite member of this cast. Could it be that the audience was primed to laugh for the national treasure? Maybe. I suppose. If I’m being diplomatic. But he and the rest of the “older gen” cast in general - specifically Miss Prism and Dr. Chasuble, who were both fantastic separately and adorable together - felt somewhat more balanced.

The short version is I wanted to love this. I wanted to be fully in the joy of this vibrant production, and in many, many cases, I was. But I feel like this production was constantly at war with itself: making bright and bold additions to the set, the music, the casting, and yet feeling like Wilde’s words needed to be screamed to be appreciated. Was I disappointed? No. I still had a wonderful night, and I still loved what I saw. But I feel like my quest to see the best possible production of this play has been only half-fulfilled, and I still dream of the production that hits Just Right.

I wrote a book about Mawdryn Undead

 

As I was getting everything together to write this up, I saw this book listed as "announced August 2022 but delayed extensively." And friends, that is fair.

My Black Archive on Mawdryn Undead was commissioned ages ago, right in the midst of me attempting to be able to write again. That's a long story, probably one for another time. But it is a bit odd to see that people are paying attention to what I say I'll do and what I ought to be doing. Thank you, I guess?

All that aside. Yes, I have a new Black Archive coming out this month, this one on Mawdryn Undead. It's up for pre-order, or perhaps indeed for regular ordering by the time this post goes out (at which point I will be in London for a week and a half). It would be fabulous of you to pick up a copy.

So, for the people who have no idea what's going on. What's Mawdryn Undead, what's the Black Archive, why any of this?

So the Black Archive is a series of book-length studies of Doctor Who stories from all across the show's run. These are heavily researched, and the goal is always to present an in-depth look at these episodes. The angle will depend on the writer. Some write more about society and culture surrounding the series, some dive into the production, some go fully academic about themes and philosophy. As of this year, I'm an editor on the series (with Stuart Douglas, Philip Purser-Hallard, and Paul Driscoll also on board and having been on board for much longer).

Mawdryn Undead came out in 1983, and it's a fifth Doctor serial that introduces companion Turlough and kicks off the Black Guardian Trilogy. I've always had a soft spot for this serial and, after working on a Black Archive on Heaven Sent several years ago, I wanted to approach a 20th century story. The funny thing is, I don't think the version I would have written a few years ago would be the same as the one I did recently, even though I kept to the topics of my pitch. Between personal experiences and the context provided by the more recent seasons of Doctor Who, there's a lot that wouldn't have been present (or as clear) in an earlier version.

So what does get covered? Turlough's role as a companion, and indeed what the role of a companion is. The Brigadier's paradox-induced amnesia and how it parallels PTSD. The lottery of regeneration and how this episode uses that uncertainty in its story. The history of "ghost ships," including the one that inspired this story. Time paradoxes and how Mawdryn Undead added a new twist to the inherent paradox of Doctor Who. And, of course, the curse of immortality.

All that said, I'd love it if you grabbed a copy and let me know what you think. And treat yourself and go through the other Archives. As of mine, there are 80, covering every Doctor and even a few more obscure contributions. Plus, we've just had a fantastic run of pitches and have some great future Archives stacked up.

Do I have another Archive in future? I'm already working on it. I'll just leave you to guess which I'm going for next. In the meantime, keep an eye on the series, because the next few books are looking to be especially fun!