BOOK REVIEW: Beth is Dead

 

BETH IS DEAD
by Katie Bernet
Available January 6

I was an enthusiastic partaker in that era of weird literary rewrites. Pride & Prejudice & Zombies and the like. By the time we hit Android Karenina, though, I was burned out. I realized I wasn't personally interested in new takes on literary classics solely because they were new takes on literary classics. That's easy enough to do, and will generally keep an audience on board for one go 'round. What's difficult, and what has more staying power, is finding new territory to explore within that space: retooling the original in a way that has value beyond that first burst of novelty.

When I first heard about Beth Is Dead, Katie Bernet's new take on Louisa May Alcott's Little Women, I will admit I was extremely worried that I was wading back into that old scene once again. That the whole point would be the shock value of a beloved literary classic being tense and bloody, and that's all. And while it is definitely a very tense read, I'm glad to say my initial fears were unfounded.

Beth Is Dead is, first and foremost, not a strict retelling of Little Women. It's a modernization of the original, close but with wiggle room. Think Emma vs. Clueless or Pygmalion vs. Selfie. The characters are there, they are recognizable as themselves, but with a realistic influence of modernity on the story. But there's one thing that notably sets this apart from those other examples: Little Women, or a version of it, exists in the world of Beth Is Dead. In this version of the story, the March family patriarch is a struggling author who finally finds success, and scandal, when he fictionalizes the story of his four daughters. There are two major changes from reality, however. The first is that Meg, Jo, Amy, and Beth are streamlined, semi-idealizes versions of themselves. The second, and weightier, is that Beth March dies in a car crash which she survived in reality. And as Beth Is Dead opens, the girl who fought to prove to the world that she is alive has been found... well, dead.

Told from the points of view of the three remaining March sisters in the present and all four in the past, the novel follows the family as they attempt to make sense of Beth's passing and find who's at fault. Fans of the original novel will recognize modernized versions of familiar characters as the case proceeds. Laurie finds himself torn between Jo and Amy, Sallie Gardiner shares a flawed and uneven friendship with Meg as they attend Harvard together, and Beth in flashback pushes herself to be more ambitious to prove her presence to fans of her father's novel. The questionable fame brought about by the book, combined with a number of secrets and personal drives, means that nearly everyone is a suspect at some level. Could Jo have killed her sister in order to have a compelling hook for her own book? Did Amy and Beth's falling out about art school figure in? What about their father, who disappeared in the wake of the book's publication to protect his family?

After the issue mentioned at the beginning of this post, my second concern going into Beth Is Dead is that the story would be used to vilify one or more beloved characters, or perhaps even Louisa May Alcott's characterizations. I needn't have worried. The way the mystery and its fallout are handled is skillful, ensuring that this version of the story doesn't negatively rewrite anything in the literary canon. I can't say much more than that without spoiling things, but I'm pleased with how it was approached.

It's also worth mentioning that Beth Is Dead isn't a takedown of Little Women at all. It's an understandable fear to have, as there are adaptations and remakes out there that aim to "fix" or "future-proof" classics. If anything is being interrogated concerning Little Women, it's the readership. How much of our perception of the March girls is Alcott's intent, and how much is the weathering that comes from decades in the zeitgeist? Are the sisters as quickly and easily defined as we like to believe? Beth Is Dead posits that, even in the original fiction, it is impossible to sum them up in a word or two. They are more than just "strong" or "bratty" or "a dear," and they always have been.

Beth Is Dead is not an attempt to "fix" or "improve" Little Women. Rather, it's an invitation to understand these beloved characters as complex and real by presenting a "what if" that modern readers can relate to. It's one of those solid reimaginings that helps you dig deeper into the original in the best possible way.

TEA PAIRING: At the Waterfront
A Little Women-inspired book deserves a Little Women-inspired tea! At the Waterfront is an herbal tea with mint, honeybush, and floral notes, featuring new art of the March sisters on the package. Use my code KARA15 at checkout for 15% off this and more bookish teas from Chapters!

Mixed Drinks on Holiday

 

As I've mentioned elsewhere, I am a sucker for limited-edition and seasonal menus. That goes for mixed drinks as well, because God knows I like a nice drink. So, while on holiday this year, I made it a point to try as many seasonal (or otherwise special) mixed drinks as I could and see how they turned out. Some amazing, some Very Okay. Some quite expensive.

Seen above is an apple and ginger cocktail from the Noël Coward Theatre bar. I can't remember the specific name it was given, but it was the featured drink on the table tents. Very strong on the ginger, very light on the fruit, and mixed very strong. I had a second one waiting for me at the interval because it was very nice. But I'm also a fan of very strong things. Not the best of the trip, but certainly nice enough to have two.

Score: 3.5/5. Good for an evening out, wouldn't seek out ingredients to replicate it.

My first drink of the trip was the Winter Warmer in British Airways' business class from JFK to Heathrow. It was described as a mix of Scotch, cranberry, blood orange, and mandarin, and it had a little Christmas tree symbol next to it to indicate it was special for the season. I loved this, and it's partly because the Scotch was so prevalent in the mix. People who aren't big on whiskey flavor would hate this, which is fair, but it was very lovely.

Score: 5/5. Fantastic, does what it says on the tin.

The holiday drink at Chez Antoinette in Covent Garden was a French martini — basically a very frothy martini with strawberry flavor and a raspberry garnish. It was a little on the sweet side for me, but still nice. Enjoyers of very sweet and fruity drinks where you don't taste the alcohol as much would like this.

Score: 3/5. Perfect for someone, not for me.

The extremely lavish London Palladium panto had a themed drink, of course: simply called the Aurora Fizz, it was a £12 Chambord and Prosecco. Very sweet and fizzy. It was an okay midday drink, and Chambord tends to circumvent my aversion to overly sweet drinks. But it was very expensive for something so simple.

Score: 2.5/5. Would have been a 3.5 but didn't live up to the price tag.

I already highlighted the special drink at the Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon. Short version, enjoyed it. 4/5

Sadly, I forgot to snap a pic of the Ginger Jamboree, the themed drink for the Jingle Jamboree charity fundraiser held at the Loading Bar. But when you're less than ten feet from the Outside Xbox faves playing LEGO Party and sharing a table with a lot of like-minded new friends, snapping pics for the blog kind of falls by the wayside. This drink was more pastry-sweet than fruit-sweet, and reminded me (appropriately enough) of gingerbread.

Score: 5/5. I've never been disappointed by a Loading Bar drink, and tonight was no different. (Bonus points for the Assassin's Mead also being fantastic, but it's a menu mainstay.)

In hindsight, this blog post makes me sound like I drink a lot. And I truly don't. But that's what a holiday is for. And I'm definitely making a point of scouting out other special drinks in future.

AFTERNOON TEA REVIEW: Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon (London)

 

Location: Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon, Fortnum & Mason, London UK

Price: £84 per person (plus add-ons); prices vary for other menus

Reservations: In advance via website

Normally I like to go to afternoon tea with at least one friend. It’s just more fun that way. But if a good tea awaits and I’m flying solo, then so be it.

The Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon is one of the poshest affairs you’re going to encounter. Situated on the fourth floor of Fortnum & Mason, it requires booking in advance and fills up very quickly. That said, if you have the time and the money, it is extremely worth it — especially at the holidays.

It was the special holiday menu that got me to go the extra mile (both literally and financially) for this particular engagement. I'm a sucker for themed and seasonal menus, just as much as I'm a sucker for a fancy afternoon tea. For diners less interested in sweets, there's a savoury afternoon tea with different scones and pastries; but I wasn't about to miss out on the desserts on offer.

Before I go into the menu, it's worth mentioning that going alone was not at all an awkward experience. Most diners were in pairs or groups, understandably; however, I was not the only solo diner there, and the waitstaff took extra time to check in on me. So if you want to check out this tearoom but have no one to go with, don't worry. You can enjoy it solo. (Or do like I did and keep sending snaps to your bestie.)

The Sandwiches

The spread came with five varieties of sandwiches, most being variations on familiar standards. Like everything else on the menu, more was available at no extra cost; but honestly a single serving was extremely filling.

• Coronation Chicken: Not something we tend to have in the US; this is a sort of curried chicken salad originally created in honor of Elizabeth II's coronation. I've never actually had coronation chicken before, but this was extremely nice. My second favorite of the sandwiches.
• Cotswold Legbar Egg Mayonnaise: You know egg salad means business when they tell you what kind of chicken the eggs come from. Honestly, though, egg salad just hits different in the UK. Just a reminder that we could have great things if we didn't chemical wash our eggs.
• Kames Bay Smoked Trout with Dill Cream Cheese: Best of the bunch, at least in my opinion. It tasted like a slightly subtler smoked salmon, which I'm always a fan of.
• Cucumber with Lemon and Mint: An old standby, but if you don't like cucumbers, this probably won't change your mind. I do, and I always save the cucumber sandwich for last.
• Christmas Spiced Suffolk Ham: I'm not big on ham (which I know is a sin for a Virginia girl), mainly because it can be so gristly and salty. But this was thin-sliced and very nice. The spice was unusual, but in a good way; very warm and wintry.

The Scones

Rather than one scone, each diner gets two little scones: one plain and one fruit. The menu says they come with strawberry & champagne preserve or orange curd, but I got little jars of both. I'd bought some of the former for myself last year so I knew I'd like it, but the latter was absolutely amazing. I'm kicking myself for not picking up a jar on my way out. There was also clotted cream which was, of course, excellent.

The Pâtisseries

As much as I love a good tea sandwich, spotting these on F&M's Instagram is what lured me over. Each one looked so beautiful, and they tasted amazing, too.

• Rose Éclair: I saved this one for last. Maybe it's my love of anything rose-flavored, but this was the best of the bunch. Very small, not overly sweet, and absolutely very floral.
• Mandarin Mousse: An orange mousse in the shape of a little Christmas bauble, this was one of the two most visually pleasing desserts (while also still being delicious). I loved the glossy outside.
• Chocolate and Cranberry Bavarois: Tied with the mandarin mousse for aesthetics, this was a little Bavarian cream treat in the shape of a shiny apple. Extremely nice.
• Sticky Figgy Loaf: The largest and densest (and sweetest) item on the menu. If I hadn't been at the far end of an afternoon tea, I might have liked it a bit more. But it sat a bit heavy. Delicious nonetheless.
• Mince Tart: Naturally. It was very standard, but very nice. Nothing over the top or inventive, but it didn't need to be.

The Teas

Of course the tea menu here is absolutely massive, considering the catalogue of blends the shop has to its name. And, like the rest of the menu, you can get refills. More importantly, you can switch up your tea if you want!

I started with the Queen Anne blend, which I'd never had before, and I was not disappointed. It's a very smooth Assam/Ceylon blend that's strong without being overpowering, meaning it served as a nice complement and palate cleanser to pretty much everything on the menu.

As I was wrapping up the last of the desserts, I went with the Smoky Earl Grey — which I'd never had but assumed I would like since I love both smoky teas and bergamot. It was as good as I'd hoped, but I was glad I waited 'til after the bulk of the meal to have it. This was a nice one for enjoying after the fact on its own.

And the Cocktail

Later in the week, I'll be making a post about the different themed and seasonal drinks I had while I was on holiday, because I made it a point to give them a go (even if they were pricey). I told you, I'm a sucker for special menus. But this one goes here, since it was part of the tea menu.

The Turtle Dove Cocktail is the drink featured in the photo above, made with rum and citrus. It tasted a bit champagney (to the point that I imagine champagne was actually part of the mix), but that's a good thing as far as I'm concerned. It was a nice lead-in to the meal, and I loved how the side of the glass was prettied up.

Again, this is a pricey afternoon, and that's a big part of why I ended up soloing this. But you get what you pay for in terms of food, tea, ambience, and experience in general. It's a lovely space with a friendly staff; and if the holiday menu is any indication, the menus year-'round are likely gorgeous. If you can swing it, treat yourself.

THEATRE REVIEW: London Palladium Panto 2025 - Sleeping Beauty

 

When I told UK types this show was on my list, the initial response was pretty much unanimous: “Have you been to a panto before?” The answer is yes, once, ages ago - but it’s true we just don’t have anything like this at home. My closest comparison is “family-friendly Rocky Horror,” but even that isn’t quite right.

All that said, there was sort of an extra layer to the London Palladium show. It wasn’t just a panto, it was their panto - with a recurring cast, running jokes, and a very specific style. If I had to compare this specific production to anything, it would be Steve Allen’s 1985 Alice in Wonderland miniseries: there’s a story we all know, and there is a central title character, but really we’re all here to see a big group of very specific talents show off. The plot is secondary, perhaps even tertiary.

This is a positive review, incidentally. There was no plot, the skits barely hung together with each other by a thread, and I had a great time.

Sleeping Beauty was the conceit, with the story fast-forwarding almost immediately to Aurora’s manufactured meet-cute with the prince and her 18th birthday. Emily Lane and Amonik Melaco gave their roles the full Disney treatment, though Melaco (who was promoted from last year’s ensemble, apparently) got an extra dose of ribbing and comedy sketch work alongside the stars. If you aren’t familiar with panto, know that they aren’t the stars. They’re the excuse for everything else.

Julian Clary, Nigel Havers, Rob Madge, and Paul Zerdin are the Palladium’s panto mainstays. Madge (whom I first saw parodying Glasgow’s Willy Wonka experience on TikTok) appeared as the Diva of Dreams, a sort of host character who also filled the good fairy roles. Ignore the second act “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” parody lyrics - Madge was a centerpiece of the production and shone through it all.

Julian Clary absolutely takes the spotlight and is clearly very loved in the panto space. His costumes, like his comedy, were wonderfully camp and over the top. His double act with Nigel Havers was delightful. And while I’m frankly picky about ventriloquists, Paul Zerdin won me over. I absolutely understand why this core group returns, and is beloved, year after year.

As for the guests, they were a Doctor Who fan’s dream. Catherine Tate (as the evil Carabosse) and Jon Culshaw (as King Julian’s detective) went toe-to-toe, going “undercover” during Aurora’s birthday celebrations. For Culshaw, this meant impressions; for Tate, despite her early-show protestations, this meant playing some of her famous characters. I never thought I’d see Nan doing a rendition of “Don’t Stop Me Now” with a chorus of dancing grannies behind here, but here we are. Culshaw was on top form as always. And while Tate’s comedy isn’t for everyone, it’s absolutely for me, and I loved it. (She handled one enthusiastic heckler with more poise than I would have.)

The sets were unbelievable, with giant thorny vines filling the front of house at the end of Act 1 and huge moving set pieces covering the stage throughout. Despite the deliberately flimsy focus on the story, the key moment of Aurora pricking her finger on the spindle had one of the most gorgeous bits of set in the whole show. A fire juggling act toward the front, depicting the burning of all spinning wheels in the kingdom, was a close second.

While the show itself was great fun, it’s also worth noting that this was the Palladium’s 10th anniversary of panto, and the opening number showcased some great moments from its past. This included Madge performing a “One Short Day” parody coupled with footage of past performances, as well as actual set pieces and props from previous years. This opening alone showed me what I was stepping into - not just a tradition of panto in the UK, but a very specific cast and style with a positive reputation.

It was huge, it was noisy, it was silly,  and I loved it. It’s vaudeville but better. It’s happy and unselfconscious and, while the panto I went to before was fun, this one helped me “get it.” It’s a bit bigger than local pantos - by which I mean a lot bigger (fire, a dozen costume changes, pyrotechnics in general) - and understandably a tougher ticker to get. But if you can? Do. Please.

THEATRE REVIEW: Ride the Cyclone

 

I remember when Ride the Cyclone took off online. And when things take off online, it’s a bit difficult to get me to partake because God knows I’ve been burned before. But this show fortunately did not disappoint, and for a couple of years now I’ve wanted to see a live performance. With Southwark Playhouse staging the show’s first-ever UK performance, I had a solid opportunity during my recent trip.

Since changes are actively made to this script over the years and there are many aspects open to interpretation, I came in a little hesitant. But frankly, I think this was fantastic. It was clearly made with a lot of love for the show and its characters, and changes and embellishments made sense.

For those unfamiliar with the show, it follows a cast of six Canadian high schoolers - Ocean, Noel, Constance, Mischa, Ricky, and an unidentified Jane Doe - who died in a roller coaster accident on a choir field trip. Under the eye of a fortune telling machine named Karnak (himself about to “die” as a rat chews through his power cable), the teens talk about their lives and dreams, with one chosen at the end of the performance to come back to life. While Ocean presses for someone of value to be chosen, the others sing about their internal lives and fantasies… or, in Jane Doe’s case, her lack thereof.

The staging is dark and dreamlike, set in the warehouse of a run-down amusement park, and this staging absolutely captured that atmosphere. Rather than being a puppet positioned to the side of the stage, Karnak was positioned above the stage and played by a live actor (Edward Wu, channeling Cecil Baldwin and doing some excellent animatronic acting). As with previous stagings, this one makes use of projections and relatively sparse set pieces. The costume changes are excellent, especially for “Noel’s Lament” and “Space Age Bachelor Man.”

The choreography was absolutely fantastic, and the cast has some amazing dancers in it. “Talia” went full-on with traditional dancing from both Mischa and Noel, as well as some surprise breakdancing from Mischa at the end. “What the World Needs” had the High School Musical vibe it deserves as well.

“The Ballad of Jane Doe” was very different from the version most will be used to staging-wise, but - and this may be contentious - I preferred this one. Jane wasn’t flown around the stage, but the floating head illusion using a coffin was fantastic and felt more appropriate for her anyway. The dancing, the funeral scene, and the final coffin lid slam at the end were all perfect, but none of the staging took away from Grace Galloway giving the vocals the full send.

As for changes that will matter to hardcore fans. “Uranium Suite” was used instead of “Fall Fair Suite,” which I understand is the norm but I’ve always thought the latter was stronger. Keeping to the changes made in 2023, Ricky is no longer written as specifically disabled, but rather as mute due to trauma. There were a few other small changes here and there, but nothing that I felt altered the flow of the performance or that newcomers would consider “odd” on a first watch. There’s also a final surprise right at the end, something I’d wished a production would do, and seeing it happens for real was amazing.

Ride the Cyclone is a show that’s extremely flexible, allowing for inventiveness that can make it better or make it feel wrong. Fortunately, this first UK outing for the show is exactly what it needed to be: dark, strange, heart-rending, funny, and gorgeous. I envy new fans experiencing the show for the first time through this production. This may well become the new bar for future productions.

BOOK REVIEW: The Snowman Code

 

THE SNOWMAN CODE
by Simon Stephenson
Available now

Blessing wants nothing more than to see her mother Margaret happy. Unfortunately, winter seems to make her sad, and this particular winter has gone on for months too long. And if her mother stays sad, then Blessing may have to move away for good. Fortunately, while she's out skipping school again, she runs into the exact right "person" to help her: a centuries-old snowman named Albert Framlington.

According to the Snowman Code, snowmen must help children in need of assistance, and Blessing definitely qualifies. In addition to the issue of her mother and the neverending winter, she's also set upon by a trio of bullies - hence why she can't go back to school. But as it happens, Albert has a problem of his own: he's looking for his lost love, Clementine, whom he hasn't seen in more than 300 years. And Blessing soon discovers that Albert's problem may be more closely tied to some of hers than expected. To release the world from winter and to help Margaret, Blessing and Albert take up the hunt to find Clementine.

The Snowman Code is just as adorable as it sound - but while it's accessible to young readers and written in a way they can easily follow, it never talks down to them. The narrative addresses a lot of heavy topics, albeit topics that young people won't be unfamiliar with: bullying, mental health (including and especially seasonal disorders), and grief at the loss of a loved one. Albert's well-meaning but reticent nature allows Blessing to be the authority in her own story, speaking out for herself in situations where she is scared or feels endangered. Which, frankly, is important.

While it does not end perfectly happily (but what story of a child befriending a snowman does?), it ends hopefully. After all, just as much as Albert wants to reunite with Clementine, Blessing wants to be back with her mother - and for her mother to be well, or at least as well as can be hoped for. Paired with Reggie Brown's cozy and friendly illustrations, this is a perfect book to read together with young family as a reassurance against the dark, cold months.

TEA PAIRING: Caramel Cabin
Albert and his snowman friends may need to be cautious around especially warm things, but this caramel black tea is perfect for humans looking to guard against the winter chill. Use my code KARA15 to save 15% on this and other blends from Chapters!